Self-Care After Trauma
For someone who is in survival mode after trauma, the idea of self-care can seem laughable. Because when you’re surviving, you’re putting everything you’ve got into staying functional, either mentally or physically or both…most often both. What we do after trauma sets the tone for the days to come. Taking care of ourselves may seem very foreign when we’ve suffered and tucked ourselves in the very back of the shelf where no one can reach or see. It’s tiring being brave, surviving bad things. It’s hard to remember that we really deserve more. Taking care of ourselves brings us gently back to who we are authentically without the irritability, reactiveness, fatigue and so on, that comes with our bodies trying to deal with the great weight of trauma and intense stress. But we weren’t built for the long haul of trauma and stress; it takes a toll on our body and mind. The good news is that we can turn that around for the most part. This is where self-care comes in. Stimulating our parasympathetic nervous system and calming our sympathetic response is crucial to overcoming barriers when working through trauma.
What works will vary person to person but there are some things that are scientifically proven to work for that beautiful partnership of our brain and body:
Connection to nature like walking in a wooded area, hiking, gardening, collecting items from nature, filling and watching bird feeders, even wiggling toes in grass helps!
Physical attention like walking, starting a new exercise regimen, rebounding, physical affirmations (like literally giving yourself a pat on the back or a hug)
Breathwork like diaphragmatic breathing is one of the best things you can do, 2 to 1 breathing (lower lungs are associated with greater PSNS activity), nostril vs. mouth breathing
Humming songs, mindfulness, tapping, meditation
Self-care can also be looking in the mirror every morning and practicing affirmations, it can be needlepoint, any hobby you like, sports, planning nutritious meals, nurturing your relationships and friendships. It’s so individualized and personalized that it’s very different for each person. But it works. There are real, science-based reasons that these kinds of things calm us, repair our body and protect us from future diseases and ailments. Along with a therapist’s help, self-care is effective in changing our responses, health and future after trauma.
Again, when we’re surviving, just getting started can be difficult. So, start small… really small. Make them a part of your daily life. And when you do, be sure to give yourself a pat on the back. You deserve it.
Written by
Natilie Land
Prevention Educator at Mutual Ground